Ohne Dich

“Langeweile besäuft sich meilenweit.
Ich zähl die Ringe an meiner Hand.
Dort draußen alles dreht sich still um nichts herum
Und ich male Deine Schatten an jede Wand.

Es kommt so anders als man denkt:
Herz vergeben, Herz verschenkt, mmh.

Ich gab Dir meine Liebe, gab Dir Zeit Geduld und Geld,
Ich legte mein Leben in Deine kleine Welt.
Wer auch immer Dir jetzt den Regen schenkt, ich hoffe es geht ihm schlecht.
Wer auch immer Dich durch die Nacht bringt, bitte glaub ihm nicht.

Es kommt so anders als man denkt:
Herz vergeben, Herz verschenkt.

Es ist so ohne Dich,
Es ist so widerlich ich will das nicht.
Denkst Du vielleicht auch mal an mich.
Es ist so ohne Dich,
Und wenn Du einsam bist,
Denkst Du vielleicht auch mal an mich.

Ich nähte mir ein Bettbezug aus der Zeit die wir hatten
Und trink mir alte Wunden an so tief und allein.
Kein Berg den ich nicht versetzt hab,
Zog jede Chance an den Haaren herbei
Für ein lebenslang zu leben
So wild und so frei.

Es kommt so anders als man denkt:
Herz vergeben, Herz verschenkt.

Es ist so ohne Dich,
Ich find es widerlich ich will das nicht.
Denkst Du vielleicht auch mal an mich.
Es ist so ohne Dich,
Und wenn Du einsam bist,
Denkst Du vielleicht auch mal an mich.

Es ist so ohne Dich,
Es ist so widerlich ich will das nicht.
Denkst Du vielleicht auch mal an mich.”

[ Ohne Dich – Hurts ]

After so much time, here is another photo for my Hurts-inspired series. Ohne Dich (which means “without you”) is one of my favourite covers Hurts recorded and I immediately found it very inspirational with this distinct image popping up in my mind. Since it is a song about loneliness and missing someone, the best choice to represent it was an emotional portrait in a urban environment with lots of distant bright lights in an otherwise dark environment: few things can feel as lonely as a city, and to me sitting with one’s own gloom amidst a lively, coloured and brightly lit city on a Saturday night is the epitome of solitude and pensiveness.
The imagery is, of course, very reminescent of the visuals of Exile, which to me are best represented by lots of glossy black: this is the main reason why I wanted black leather in it. Uriele was the best fit thanks to his edgy look: that’s one of his casual attires (we were actually going home after a dinner with some friends when I asked him to stop and pose), which gives the photo more authenticity. I wanted it to look everyday-like without losing its fashion mood, and a friend with a posh everyday look would certainly convey both feelings.
Random funny fact: given we’re both heartless bitches, to get the right expression and mood I told him, “Okay, now sit down and think of that beautiful white backpack you couldn’t buy because it sold out. You’re sitting there without it. Oh there, perfect”. It worked better than if I asked him to think of someone he was missing and I got the exact image I wanted in just a minute or so. Fortunately, since it was too cold to have him sit down without his coat!

Divergent Mirrors Of Decay

“You told me how to get myself prepared.
It’s like your freedom, but reversible.
So please, take me home again, my friend.
As long as you’re invincible
And partly not inflammable,
I thought you were convincible, my friend.

And I lie and I lie.
I’m my own believer.
Shall you burn, shall you die,
My self-conscious gleaner?
And you’re blind, and you’re blind.
Celebrating glory,
Get inside on my side.
Searching some fairy traps,
Here you kill, here you hide.
My imprisoned beauty,
You can struggle, you can fight.
And ‘cause your screams are muted,
Run away, run away.
If you’re tired to decide,
I’m afraid, I’m afraid
To lose reality.

Heroic is not what you used to be.
Sometimes you smell like you dig carefully.
So I am, you never start to change.
You cannot gain.
As long as you’re inflammable,
Convinced you’re not invincible,
You part my way to take me home again.

And I lie and I lie.
I’m my own believer.
Shall you burn, shall you die,
My self-conscious gleaner?
And you’re blind, and you’re blind.
Celebrating glory,
Get inside on my side.
Searching some fairy traps,
Here you go, here you hide.
My imprisoned beauty,
You can struggle, you can fight.
‘Cause our screams are muted,
Run away, run away.
If you’re tired to decide,
I’m afraid, I’m afraid
To lose reality.”

[ Divergent Mirrors Of Decay – Leandra ]

Here is the second work from my Morphine series and first from the Isomorphine part. Again, the last song goes first because I needed to use this table mirror, which is at my mother’s.

This photo was born as a twin sister to Inverted Mirrors Of Decay, since the titles of the two songs are very similar. While it might seem somewhat less surreal than its sister with no upside-down reflection, there is actually no way two mirrors pointing to opposite directions might actually reflect someone sitting in the middle, so it still fits into the category. And the burning reflection does as well.
Similarly to the other Mirror, the lyrics of this song are very complex and and filled with mostly obscure metaphors, so I decided to get most of the inspiration from the title itself and throw a few nods to the rest of the songs such as the fire, which also contrasts with the liquid theme on the other Mirror. Again, given the shortage of mirrors and different angles to take into account, there are about five different images blended into one, which required a massive help from DamaInNero and quite a lot of postproduction, which I handled smoothly due to careful planning since before the actual shoot. Indeed, the planning is what made this work so fun and challenging, as everything had to work accordingly in order for the whole to turn out nice. I think I’m going for such complex pictures again in the future, in the end they are very rewarding.

Inverted Mirrors Of Decay

“Two mice I saw are drowned in butter,
‘Cause neither he’s wise nor he’s wiser.
Two mice I saw are drowned in butter,
‘Cause neither he’s wise nor his parents.

Two eyes I shut to see you closer.
Why did you bath in muddy waters?
Inside I feel you’re my disposer,
Outside there’s nothing to hide from but you.

Tonight I died of my reflection.
I suddenly fell into milk and
Been kicking and screaming
To tie the ball of my projection,
So guess what a mouse had turned out to be.

And I’m drowning, I’m drowning
I’m drowning, I’m drowning,
I’m drowning…

Wake up.
Why are you so predictable?
Beautiful morning
Sounds like our minds can be so invincible.
Follow the warning sign.
It could be mine, it could be mine.

And I die for deserving a swim through your river.
I’m calling the ghosts of the certain deceiver, and I’m
Burning the hay. Oh, I will find the needle.
I drown in the water. The water is me, but I
Know that I’m eager to choke the results
Of particular cravings, of hunger, of thirst,
Of polemic embraces. Oh, comfort my tongue
While they dress and uncover and write you a song for them.
I will not sigh and I will not enchant you.
You’ve covered me blind for translations to hide to arise you.
I run from the shadow, the shadow is mine to despise you.
We’re running out of time.”

[ Inverted Mirrors Of Decay – Leandra ]

So, here is the first work from my Morphine series, specifically from the Metamorphine part. I’m starting from the last track on the album because I only have the table mirror at my mother’s house and I would have to wait until god knows when if I didn’t get the chance now.

As I mentioned while introducing the project, there is going to be a lot of surreal imagery, and this is a primary example of that. I also wrote that I had a few ideas about the Metamorphine songs since I first listened to the album, but I never quite tried to turn them into actual photographs. Inverted Mirrors Of Decay is one of those, and one of the reasons I decided to kick off the project was the fact I could do two parallel images with this one and Divergent Mirrors Of Decay.
To be honest, the lyrics are quite surreal themselves and way too full of imagery to be wholly represented in a single photo, so I decided to stick to a more general concept and draw mainly from the title to create the image. The idea is the dear old “the mirror reflects something different” twisted in order to fit the title, so I’m basically sitting there while the two mirrors give back something totally different. I decided to add a bowl of milk to strengthen the connection with the lyrics and I had quite a lot of fun playing with the upside-down reflection, both with the hair and the spilling liquid. As I only had one mirror and had to shoot the reflections from different angles, the final image is made up of a total of about six photos put together, so the tripod and the assistance of my mother, DamaInNero, were extremely helpful to get everything right. The postproduction was quite massive, too, but as I had mapped out all I needed to do from the beginning it wasn’t beyond my abilities.
Of course, as I was handling the props I shot Divergent Mirrors Of Decay the very same day, so it’s coming soon.

Morphine: presentation of the project

I feel kind of guilty whenever I start a new project without completing any of the ongoing ones. But you know, inspiration strikes in the most unexpected moments and I have to do something before it fades.

Recently, Belarusian-German singer and pianist Leandra released her sophomore album, called Isomorphine, six years after her debut, Metamorphine. Both albums are incredibly good and the apparent connection between the two titles instantly intrigued me. Also, the songs on Isomorphine are extremely inspirational and I immediately started having a bunch of ideas about them; I had tons of ideas about Metamorphine too when I first heard it, back in 2008, but at the time I didn’t even have my first reflex, let alone any means to fully develop them. So I decided to resurrect a few of those old, shelved ideas, combine them with the new ones and and poof, I had enough material to kick off a new series rather than taking unrelated photos.

Leandra’s songs are very unique both musically and lyrically: the two albums sound different, with Metamorphine being more darkwave and classical-oriented while Isomorphine is more synthpop and dance-oriented, but Leandra’s distinctive songwriting makes many songs somewhat lullaby-ish… in a twisted way. Both her melodies and lyrics have certain qualities that give a nursery rhyme feel, but one that lulls you into nightmares rather than a peaceful sleep (she even wrote a downright hell-like song explicitly called Lullaby). This sort of dark, oneiric quality inspired me with lots of surreal imagery: many of the works will thus have some twist that makes the image unrealistic or possibly even unsettling, which will of course require a great deal of postproduction. Another stylistic standpoint which I have already clear is the colour filters I will use. I think both album covers perfectly convey the general feel of the songs, so I will be paying homage to them by adopting two colour schemes for the two halves of the project: the Metamorphine half will be greenish and the Isomorphine half pinkish. This will give a further sense of homogeneity to the series while allowing me to develop each work as a stand-alone piece, and will require me to plan everything in the photos, from the lights to the colours in them, in order for this kind of postproduction to be fitting.

I’ve started 2014 with a big shoot for two works from this project, one from Metamorphine and the other from Isomorphine. I am currently postproducing the first, which is due to be published tomorrow. I hope being so productive on New Year’s Day will bring me luck for the whole 2014, so wish me luck and enjoy Leandra’s music while watching my upcoming photos!